The National:

IN a rare bit of good news for Brits looking for clarity during the coronavirus pandemic, our straight-to-the-point and not-at-all-evasive Prime Minister Boris Johnson will once again be taking questions directly from the UK public.

Putting aside the fact that one of his own health ministers, Nadine Dorries, today inadvertently admitted that Johnson knows absolutely nothing at all about the pathology of the coronavirus, the session is sure to be enlightening and informative as ever.

The first time we were treated to a “Public PMQs”, we got such erudite insights as the fact that Johnson thinks it’s important for him to “talk up the successes” of the Union and how Faslane’s nuclear submarines show that “Scotland in particular” benefits from being in the UK…

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The PM also used his August 2019 slot to assure us that Brexit would be “done” by October 31 last year, and that there would not be a General Election after that date.

Given the prescience of those answers, is it really any surprise how excited the British public were to be given another chance to submit questions for the PM to cherry-pick the easiest to answer?

Announcing the exciting opportunity on Twitter earlier, Johnson (or whichever Downing Street aide runs his Twitter account) wrote simply: “I’ll be answering some of your questions about coronavirus.

“Ask your questions at http://gov.uk/ask”

Showing Johnson about as much heed as usual, the British public didn’t bother following that link though, and the pile-on soon began.

One Twitter user wrote: “Dear Boris, Could you confirm that by breaking the Good Friday Agreement you are both breaking international law & putting the security of another country at risk?

“Funny how that's the dictionary definition of a Rogue State.”

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Another, referring to Brexiteer Claire Fox, added: “Why did you give an IRA apologist a peerage?”

Comedian Russel Kane asked: “Is it true that the virus drops harmlessly to the ground once you are safely in a pub?”

Another wrote: “Here's my question: why do you prioritise profit-making over public health?”

Others focused on the Government’s recent admission that they were breaking international law, but only in a “specific and limited way”.

One wrote: “If the government can break the law, can I do so too?” while another added: “So which international laws can I break?”

Another asked: “Can I break the guidance if I do it in a specific and limited way?

“Specifically I would like to hold a rave, but I will limit it to 10,000 people.”

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Still more haven’t quite forgotten the insult handed to the public during the height of lockdown, asking: “Why didn't you sack Dominic Cummings for his clear and obvious breaches of covid-19 lockdown restrictions?"

One David Sears asked: “As I live in the north east can you recommend any castles a couple of hundred miles south I can get my eyes tested at.

“Barnard castle, while good, is a bit close so results will be inconclusive.”

“Mustique, Chequers or Barnard Castle. Which provides the greatest opportunity to avoid doing the day job and the greatest risk to the general public?” another added.